We all grew up around them. We all cussed them. Yet
we all knew that it was inevitable that one day we were
going to join the ranks of these people that drive us crazy.
I'm there … At least to a degree. I still need to buy a white
belt and penny loafers yet.. but that's just a formality.
I noticed it first the other day as I was driving home from
the camper. This inpatient speed demon was glued to my
rear bumper like a stamp to an envelope. Who knows how
long he was there. My first thought was to just slow down...
"That'll learn him" I thought. After all the speed limit is only
fifty MPH on this road. But as I looked down to adjust my
speed I noticed I was only doing thirty five. Crap ! I hate
people like me. After sheepishly pulling over to let him pass
I made it a point to go sixty for the rest of the trip. I never
did catch him though.. I guess he had some time to make up.
I still go back to my theory that one ought to have a knob on
their head to control how far ones mind can wander in such
situations.
To make matters worse I found myself in the grocery store
yesterday standing right smack dab in the middle of the aisle
reading labels and checking my list on my phone not once but
twice. I was ready to ram myself with the buggy like I wanted
to do to so many people over the years.
Hopefully this is a temporary condition brought on by the
holiday related fog that's been in my head lately. For somebody
that has lived his life not giving a Rat's A$$ about anything I
sure seem to have a lot on my mind lately. I think it has something
to do with Global warming. That's my story and I'm sticking to it !!
Now for my evil side....
Back in the old chatroom days I went by the name of EZGoin'.
After a while I had several people tell me that I wasn't assertive
enough so they affectionately changed my name to TOOEZGoin'
Those days must be slipping away as I find myself getting into more
'discussions' than normal lately. One was a two hour and forty five
min typing marathon about ..you guessed it .. my least favorite
politician. Now I'll admit I know very little about politics and even
less about religion. But I do know a whole lot about my personal
feelings on mixing the two. So after we bantered about Jobs (yes they
are up .. but check the job quality index) unemployment (yes it is down
benefits only last 26 weeks) I argued right or wrong about every issue
under the sun. I even went by Trumps playbook and just made stuff up
and presented it as facts. All you have to do is add a "They're saying" or
"I've heard it said" or "I read somewhere" and all of the sudden it's fact.
It all ended with the "God sent him down here to straighten out this mess".
Calmly I stated that possibly God could have done that .. but maybe
God had done it for different reasons. Perhaps it was a test. Perhaps he
wanted to see who would abandon their morals and values and follow a
man who surely loves to spread hate and demean everyone who doesn't
worship him. I'm not sure what the Bible says about self worship but I
have read a few passages on adultery, lying, bragging and caring for one
another. That's when I think there must have been a power outage in
his area..
Before you all add me to your prayer list and try to save my soul I
have to add that I felt terrible afterwards and for several days I was a bit
snappy at anything that even came close to the subject. (as some might
have noticed ) I've learned my lesson.. from now on my name is going
to be WAAAAAAYTOOEZGoin' I stepped over my own line on this one...
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