Why ? Just because...

Why ?  Just because...
        I can think of no other reason for starting
a You Tube channel.  When I first started my 
channel I did it to watch videos of like minded
people participating in the things that I enjoy
doing.  I learned a lot from the different people
on there about camping, prepping, hunting and 
fishing and so on.  Plus doing things I had always 
dreamed about doing but never attempted like
building a camper van and traveling.  Kind of like
becoming a modern day Hobo..lol   Never did I 
ever have any intentions of making videos to share
on-line.  After all what am I qualified at besides
 shooting the bull and telling corny jokes.
        Then one day it happened.   People started
going to my channel when they would see me in a 
live stream and checking it out only to find a "This
channel has no content" banner.  I really didn't like
that so I  decided to make one video just as a kind
of intro so there would be at least something there 
when they went to visit.  As rough as it was since 
I had no idea of how to edit anything, people started
commenting and encouraging me.  Now almost fifty
videos later it is the high point of my day to go in and
read the comments people have left.  Admittedly these
people don't know me .  They only know what I want 
them to know about me.  They don't know the inattentive
me or the crude and sometimes selfish me.  They only 
know the me I show them.  Still their  flattering comments
warm my heart.  I think as I go through life I feel less
and less useful and relevant.   I even think at times that
If I could just slip off somewhere the world would be
a better place.  I do think I've served a useful purpose on
this spinning rock but like most things I feel pretty much
used up.  Maybe people would notice .. maybe not  but ...
WOW !  Got a little dark there.  Lets get to the lighter side.
Then I post a video and get comments from all over the
country .. even the world and it really picks me up a bit.
Of course nobody's going to say The video was terrible 
or "my your fat"...lol  They are all going to be nice.  Kind
of makes you feel useful again To make someone laugh
or smile or even pick up a little tip from something you 
posted.  
       I have made many friends since joining You Tube.
Some I have met in person .. most I have not. But through
videos and conversations I consider a good many of them
friends.  Then again.. I only know what they want me to 
know about them also.  I guess what I'm getting at is I'm
probably using You Tube and it's flattering comments as
a crutch to get through an 'unappreciated' stage of my life.
And it's working !!!   haha  
        Well I'd better go charge my camera so I can shoot a 
new video to post tomorrow.  It's been a while and I'm 
running low on self esteem.  Got to get those comments
flowing......